What is your Dating Identity?
Sometimes it can seem that you're stuck in a rut with your dates - if you go on any dates at all. Take this quiz to understand your 'Dating Identity' that informs how you think, feel, and act when you date.
Instructions:
Consider the following situations. You may not have experienced these scenarios exactly, and you may not react in the ways explained. Select the option that most sounds like the way you would think, feel, or behave. Choose what's most true for you in general. Remember, being honest in your answers will give a clearer picture.
Section A: Growing Up
Reflect on what you remember of your childhood as you consider the following questions:
Did you enjoy being around your mum?
*
I didn't hate it, but I didn't love it
It was ok I suppose - from the little I remember
Yes I mostly enjoyed being around her
Yes - although she would tell me what to do a lot
Yes - I was really close to her and spent as much time with her as I could
Extended family or friends would describe my relationship with my mum as:
*
Angry
Independent
Happy
Nervous
Clingy
I remember my first day at school because...
*
...actually I don't really remember it.
...I felt scared inside, but didn't show it - I just got on with it.
...I was worried at first, but got to make new friends.
...I didn't want to leave at first and I was scared when my mum first left me there.
...I cried - I eventually calmed down because the teacher was nice.
When you think about how your parents were together, they seemed:
*
They didn't actually stay together.
Like a passive/ aggressive nightmare to be honest - I kind of got on with my own thing
Pretty good with each other actually, and generally supportive of what I wanted to do
Constantly worried about offending each other all the time, and could be really overly-interested in everything I did.
A bit over the top - one was worried about the other's temper getting out of hand - I tried to keep my head down and do the right thing.
Calculation-Anxious-Avoidant
Section B: Dating Now
Think about your *current* dating experiences as you consider the following scenarios.
How many dates have you had in the last three months?
*
None
1
2-4
5-7
More than 7
How would you feel if a stranger came up to you in the street, complimented you, and asked for your number?
*
Shocked - that would *never* happen to me. Why would anyone want to go out with me from just seeing me in the street?
Embarrassed - and I would give a fake number. How could anyone choose to go out with me from just seeing me in the street? It's unrealistic.
Surprised but flattered - and I would say thanks and politely decline giving my number. I don't do that kind of thing.
Embarrassed but flattered - and I would give my number hoping they would call. Romance can happen anywhere.
Happy - this has happened to me and I've been on a date in this situation. I'm open to new experiences.
When using online dating:
*
I keep my profile pretty basic. If someone's interested, then it's up to them to message
I make sure I only reply to those that are 100% perfect - otherwise what's the point?
I try and be selective about the messages I send and reply so I can maintain some kind of quality
It's important to reply to messages as soon as possible so guys know you're interested, and you can start a conversation
I reply to every message because you never know where it's going to lead - besides - I've always got lots going on
At the end of a date, or in the few days after a date:
*
I'm either nervous or disappointed - so unsure what I should do - I usually end up waiting before moving on
I've been told a few times that 'there's no spark' or 'we should only be friends' - it's really frustrating
I like to be clear - if I want to see them again, I tell them; if I don't want to see them again, I tell them
I ask them 'Would you like to meet up again?' - they usually do
I always make sure I message that we should go on a second date because you can't really know after meeting them once
Calculation-Number-Dates
Your Details
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