Johari Window

Instructions:

Carefully read each statement.

Rating from the available choices, choose to what degree each statement is the most like you or most like the person you are completing this for.

You will rate each statement as follows:

• A
• Usually, A
• Little more A than B
• Little more B than A
• Usually, B
• B

For this to be effective, you must be completely honest. 

After you have charted your scores for best results, have someone you trust completely complete the questionnaire from the perspective of how they perceive you. Chart their scores on your chart and shade the differences. 

Discuss the results.

1.   

A friend of mine had a “personality conflict” with a mutual acquaintance of ours with whom it was vital for them to get along; I would:

 A.   Tell my friend I felt they were partially responsible for problems with this other person. Then try to convey how the person was being affected.

 B.   Not get involved because it isn’t my business, and I could lose my relationship with one or both.

2.   

One of my friends and I had a heated argument in the past, and I realized that they were ill at ease around me from that time on; I:

 A.   Avoid making things worse by discussing their behavior and just let the whole thing drop.

 B.   Bring up their behavior and ask them how they felt the argument had affected our relationship.

3.    

My spouse began to avoid me and act in an aloof and withdrawn manner; I:

 A.   Tell them about their behavior and suggest they tell me what was on their mind.

 B.   Follow their lead and keep our contact brief and aloof since that seems to be what they want.

4.   

Two of my friends and I were talking, and one slipped and brought up a personal problem of mine that involved the other friend, of which they were not yet aware, I:

 A.   Change the subject and signal my friend to do the same.

 B.   Fill my uninformed friend in on what the other friend was talking about and suggest we go into it later.

5.   

A friend tells me that, in their opinion, I was doing things that made me less effective than I might be in social situations; I:

 A.   Ask them to spell out or describe what they have observed and suggested changes I might make.

 B.   Resent their criticism and let them know why I behave like I do.

6.   

A church member aspires to an office in our organization for which I feel they are unqualified. They’ve been tentatively assigned to that position by the Leader (Pastor/Elder/Aux. Leader), I:

 A.   Do not mention my misgivings to either them or the leader and let them handle it in their own way.

 B.   Tell them and the leader of our group of my misgivings. Then leave the final decision up to them.

7.   

I feel one of my friends is being selfish and unfair to their other friends and me, but none of them had mentioned anything about it; I:

 A.   Ask several of them how they perceived the situation to see if they feel like I do.

 B.   Stay silent and don’t ask the others how they perceived our friend but wait for them to bring it up with me.

8.   

While preoccupied with some personal matters, a friend told me that I had been acting irritable and that I was jumping on them for little things; I:

 A.   Tell them I was preoccupied, would probably be on edge for a while, and would prefer not to be bothered.

 B.   Listen to their complaints but not try to explain my actions to them.

9.   

Some friends are discussing an ugly rumor about another friend, and I know it could hurt them. The friend asked me what I knew about it; I:

 A.   Say I didn’t know anything about it and tell them no one would believe a rumor like that anyway.

 B.   Tell them precisely what I had heard, when I had heard it, and from whom I had heard it.

10.   

A supervisor pointed out that I had a personality conflict with a coworker with whom it was important for me to get along; I:

 A.   Consider their comments out of line and biased. Become silent and not engage in the discussion further.

 B.   Talk openly with them to determine their perception and how I can best handle the issue.

11.   

My relationship with my spouse has been damaged by repeated arguments on an issue of importance to us both. I:

 A.   Am cautious in my conversations with them so the issue would not come up again to worsen our relationship.

 B.   Point to the problems the controversy was causing in our relationship and suggest we discuss it until we resolve it.

12.   

In discussion with my child about their problems and behavior, they suddenly suggested we discuss my problems and behavior as well as their own; I:

 A.     Avoid the discussion by suggesting that my problems and behavior are none of their concern.

B.   Welcome the opportunity to hear what they felt about me and encourage their comments.

13.   

A friend tells me their unfavorable feelings about another friend they felt was being unkind to others. I agree wholeheartedly; I:

 A.   Listen and express my feelings to them so they know where I stand.

 B.   Listen, but not express my own views because they might repeat what I said to them in confidence.

14.   

I believe an ugly rumor is being spread about me and suspect that one of my friends had likely heard it; I:

 A.   Avoid mentioning the issue and leave it to them to tell me about.

 B.   Risk putting them on the spot by asking them directly what they knew about the whole thing.

15.   

I observed a friend in social situations and thought that they were doing some things which hurt their relationships; I:

 A.   Risk being seen as a busy body and telling them what I observed and my reactions to it.

 B.   Keep my opinion to myself rather than be seen as interfering in things that are none of my business.

16.   

Two friends and I were talking, and one of them inadvertently mentioned a personal problem that involved me, that I was unaware of; I:

A.   Press them for information about the problem and their opinions about it.

B.   Leave it up to my friends to tell, letting them change the subject if they wish.

17.   

A friend seems to be preoccupied with some personal issues, acting irritated with me and others and jumping on people for seemingly unimportant things without genuine cause; I:

 A.   Treat them with kid gloves for a while. Assuming that they have temporary personal problems that were none of my business.

 B.   Try to talk to them, pointing out how their behavior affects me and others.

18.   

I have begun to dislike certain habits of a loved one to the point that it is interfering with my enjoying their company, I:

 A.   Say nothing to them but let them know my feelings by ignoring them whenever their annoying habits are obvious.

 B.   Get my feelings out in the open and clear the air so we can continue our relationship comfortably and enjoyably.

19.   

In discussing social behavior with one of my more sensitive friends, I:

 A.   Avoid mentioning their flaws and weaknesses so as not to hurt their feelings.

 B.   Focus on their flaws and weaknesses so they can improve their interpersonal skills.

20.   

I have been assigned to a position in the church. My friends’ attitudes toward me have changed for the worse. They indicate that the position has changed me; I:

 A.   Discuss my shortcomings with my friends so I could see where to improve.

B.   Try to figure out my shortcomings by myself so that I can improve.

Charting Your Scores:

• On the top line of the graph below, mark your score for Solicits Feedback, then draw a vertical line downward.
• On the left line of the graph below, mark your score for Willing to Self- Disclose/Give Feedback, then draw a line horizontally (left to right).