The ABC exercise is used in several different forms of cognitive behavioral therapy as a way to activate the prefrontal cortex.

Irrational beliefs are rigid underscoring mental illness, such as with depression and anxiety, whereas rational beliefs are more flexible and linked to mental health. Therapy assertively attempts to shift irrational beliefs to rational ones. Emotion regulation and adaptability are robustly advanced, and certainly the latter as irrational beliefs reduce the capacity to adapt to ever changing circumstances.

Thoughts and feelings about this situation, like every other are like waves--they come, are here for a short while, and then they are gone.  Remind yourself that no thought or feeling is permanent.  You have never felt a feeling forever, and you have never had a thought in your head 100% of the time all the way through your life.  They are all just temporary experiences.  Try to accept that you have troubling thoughts and feelings sometimes.  Try to treat them as visitors that come for a little while and then leave.  Make an effort to not judge yourself or anyone else for having them, viewing them as a natural part of living.  All humans experience them; it is normal and healthy. 

Thoughts that lead to feelings that don't resolve on their own may indicate Stuck Points. 

Here are some exmples.

Examples of Stuck Points

1. If I had done my job better, then other people would have survived.

2. Because I did not tell anyone, I am to blame for the abuse.

3. Because I did not fight against my attacker, the abuse is my fault.

4. I should have known he would hurt me.

5. It is my fault the accident happened.

6. If I had been paying attention, no one would have died.

7. If I hadn’t been drinking, it would not have happened.

8. I don’t deserve to live when other people lost their lives.

9. If I let other people get close to me, I’ll get hurt again.

10. Expressing any emotion means I will lose control of myself.

11. I must be on guard at all times.

12. I should be able to protect others.

13. I must control everything that happens to me.

14. Mistakes are intolerable and cause serious harm or death.

15. No civilians can understand me.

16. If I let myself think about what has happened, I will never get it out of my mind.

17. I must respond to all threats with force.

18. I can never really be a good, moral person again because of the things that I have done.

19. Other people should not be trusted.

20. Other people should not trust me.

21. If I have a happy life, I will be dishonoring my friends.

22. I have no control over my future.

23. The government cannot be trusted.

24. People in authority always abuse their power.

25. I am damaged forever because of the rape.

26. I am unlovable because of [the trauma].

27. I am worthless because I couldn’t control what happened.

28. I deserve to have bad things happen to me.

29. I am dirty.

30. I deserved to have been abused.

31. Only people who were there can understand.

32. If I don't explain everything in detail, then you won't understand (or believe me).
 

 

Because you have decided that you would like to feel or behave differently (or are unsure about your thoughts and behaviors), let's walk through a series of mental exercises that might help you balance your thougths and emotions.  

Feel free to skip any exercise that you do not want to do now.

 

 

What makes me think the thought is true?

What makes me think the thought is not true or not completely true?

What’s another way to look at this?

If the worst happens, what could I do then?

What’s the best that could happen?

What will probably happen?

What will happen if I keep telling myself the same thought?

What could happen if I changed my thinking?

What would I tell my friend or family member [think of a specific person] if this happened to them?

What would be good to do now?

Is your Stuck Point a habit or based on facts?

In what ways is your Stuck Point not including all of the information?

Does your Stuck Point include all-or-none terms?

Does the Stuck Point include words or phrases that are extreme or exaggerated (such as “always,” “forever,” “never,” “need,” “should,” “must,” “can’t,” and “every time”)?

In what way is your Stuck Point focused on just one piece of the story?

Where did this Stuck Point come from? Is this a dependable source of information on this Stuck Point?

How is your Stuck Point confusing something that is possible with something that is likely?

In what ways is your Stuck Point based on feelings rather than facts?

In what ways is this Stuck Point focused on unrelated parts of the story?

What does it mean to hold on to these beliefs?

What does holding on to these beliefs do for you?

What if you no longer held on to these beliefs, then what?

On a scale from 0 to 10, where 10 is you feel you're at your best, use the slider to give a number to how you're doing in each of these areas.

There is a lot to process on the planet. When you feel in need of the extra support feel free to reach out!