No one knows the path that their healthcare journey will take them on. Some people live healthily until old age and pass away quietly in their sleep or after a brief illness. For others, the aging process can be more extended and complex. Modern medicine can sometimes offer wonderful solutions. At other times, treatments can extend one’s life with significant burdens and without providing a cure.
Judaism places a premium on preserving life. It is also concerned with preserving quality of life and alleviating suffering. Proxies will frequently need to choose a plan of care in the face of medical uncertainties. Given the individualized nature of each case, end-of-life decision making requires a thoughtful and personalized approach.
By completing this guide, you will help your proxy and rabbi better understand your goals and preferences so they can better apply them to each unique situation. It is also a gift to your loved ones as it helps avoid family tensions and guilt caused by speculating about your values and preferences when decisions need to be made. Meaningful conversations about life and death can bring families together.
Confronting the questions in this document may be challenging. They make you you think about what makes your life worth living, what you value most about your mental, spiritual and physical health, what you fear, and what you would not want to live without. Precisely because it’s difficult, it offers an opportunity to formulate what matters most to you.
While you may fill this out on your own, it’s best to utilize it as a part of discussions with your proxy, family members, and rabbi. Take the opportunity to express what you believe is necessary to maintain a dignified life and what you think you are willing to endure. Share the completed document with your proxy, loved ones, and rabbi, and keep it in a safe but accessible place. Review this guide periodically to ensure that your preferences remain up-to-date and to facilitate ongoing conversation about these questions.