God created us male and female and gave us marriage so that husband and wife may help and comfort each other, living faithfully together in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, throughout all their days. God gave us marriage for the full expression of the love between a man and a woman. In marriage a woman and a man belong to each other, and with affection and tenderness freely give themselves to each other. God gave us marriage for the well being of human society, for the ordering of family life, and for the birth and nurture of children. God gave us marriage as a holy mystery in which a man and a woman are joined together, and become one, just as Christ is one with the church. In marriage, husband and wife are called to a new way of life, created, ordered, and blessed by God."
Pre-marital counseling is one of the best tool couples can have to prepare for a fulfilling and successful marriage. The goal of this time is to help couples understand themselves and one another as they begin a lifelong covenant relationship. The pastor(s) of Chapel by the Lake require pre-marital counseling before they officiate in any marriage service. In most cases, the minister(s) performing the service will provide this counseling. In some circumstances, the minister and couple may agree to another outside counseling arrangement. In all cases, the counseling must be completed 45 days before the scheduled marriage service. The minister performing the marriage service will need to be in contact with the person providing the counseling.
The following topics are important areas to be prayerfully discussed in the process of pre-marital counseling. They include family history, personal faith expression and experiences, personality traits, finances, intimacy, career goals, family traditions, and other areas that may arise in the counseling process.
There may be times when the minister is convinced, after discussion with the couple, that commitment, responsibility, maturity, or Christian understanding are so lacking that the marriage is unwise. The minister may decide not to officiate the marriage service. The minister may continue to provide counsel to a couple in an effort to further prepare them for Christian Marriage.
Most couples will meet with the minister for four to six sessions. Most sessions range from sixty to ninety minutes. In addition, the pastor may ask the couple to read a book and discuss it together. In addition to pre-marital counseling, the couple may meet with the pastor to discuss and design the Christian Marriage Service.