Default Conflict Response Style

We each have our own way of dealing with conflict. The techniques we use are based on many variables such a our basic underlying temperament, our personality, our environment and where we are in our professional career. However, by and large there are five major styles of conflict management techniques in our tool box. In order to address conflict we draw from a collaborating, competing, avoiding, harmonizing or compromising style of management. None of these strategies is superior in and of itself. How effective they are depends on the context in which they are used.

Each statement below provides a strategy for dealing with a conflict. Rate each statement on a scale of 1 to 4 indicating how likely you are to use this strategy.

1 = Rarely    2 = Sometimes.    3 = Often    4 = Always

Be sure to answer the questions indicating how you would behave rather than how you think you should behave.

Your Score Breakdown (Scale 3-12):

Collaborating:  {collaborating}

Competing: {competing}

Avoiding: {avoiding}

Accommodating: {accommodating}

Compromising: {compromising}

 

Collaborating

This style aims to solve problems in ways in which an optimum result is provided for all involved. Both sides get what they want and negative feelings are minimized. This style aims to create win-win outcomes, but if there isn't enough time, energy, or buy-in, it can result in a breakdown of the process.

Pros: Creates mutual trust; maintains positive relationships; builds commitments.
Cons: Time consuming; energy consuming

Competing

This style is highly goal-oriented, with a focus on getting things done and being right. As a result, relationships take on a lower priority.  This style may be more open to aggressive or autocractic tactics, sometimes creating win-lose situations.

Pros: Goal oriented; quick.
Cons: May breed hostility.

Avoiding

This style tends to experience discomfort or anxiety with conflict and would rather avoid it as much as possible. People using this style may shut down or leave a situation in conflict. The avoidance of conflict can result in not proritizing their own goals or those of others, sometimes creating lose-lose situations.

Pros: Does not escalate conflict; postpones difficulty.
Cons: Unaddressed problems; unresolved problems.

Accommodating

This style prioritizes relationships and the needs of others over their own. People with this style as a default tend to prioritize group harmony even at their own expense. By prioritizing other's goals, this style sometimes creates win-lose situations where the accommodator loses.

Pros: Minimizes injury when we are outmatched; relationships are maintained.
Cons: Breeds resentment; exploits the weak.

Compromising

This style aims to balance both goals and relationships with an emphasis on each person sacrificing a bit of their needs.  People using this style will emphasize balance and meeting in the middle, which can be complex when negotiating with other conflict styles.  The emphasis on each person giving up a little bit of their goals often creates outcomes where everyone agrees to the outcome but no one feels happy about it.

Pros: Useful in complex issues without simple solutions; all parties are equal in power.
Cons: No one is ever really satisfied; less than optimal solutions get implemented.