What's your company's giving personality?
Is your giving a spreadsheet masterpiece or a glorious dumpster fire? Find out today!
How does your company handle time for giving?
Time? It either takes 72% of my time or we donate while waiting for the microwave popcorn to finish — there's no in between.
It's a balancing act that requires squeezing it in between Zooms, meetings that could have been emails, and impromptu fire drills.
Giving has its own slot, complete with calendar invites, reminders, and a ceremonial gong.
What’s your giving process like?
Does a crumpled pile of sticky notes on the breakroom fridge count as a process?
A spreadsheet saved as “final_final_FINAL2.xlsx."
A color-coded spreadsheet with conditional formatting that would make any accountant proud.
Is there a team or person responsible for corporate giving?
No one knows. Sometimes the intern. Sometimes the office dog. Maybe Dave in Accounting.
The responsible person coordinates giving, accidental ‘reply all’ disasters, and employee pizza parties simultaneously.
A dedicated team with clear roles, processes, and matching shirts with bells.
Do employees know about your company's philanthropy?
No one has any clue the company gives. They thought ‘charitable initiatives’ was just a new printer model.
Some know, some suggest quirky causes, and someone once pitched a donation to a hamster marathon.
Everyone knows, debates, votes, and contributes to giving strategy like it’s a competitive board game with spreadsheets.
Do your donations match your company’s values?
We once gave money to a cat circus. Yes, really.
Mostly aligned. Some donations are weird side-projects, like Bob’s stamp collection charity.
Every initiative screams our mission louder than a motivational poster being yelled through a megaphone.
How does your company pick causes to support?
Randomness rules. Sometimes we support causes that involve rubber ducks or water bottle races.
Whoever emails first (or maybe last — it’s a toss-up).
We strategically align causes with our mission, impact potential, and employee suggestions — sometimes with ceremonial confetti.
How effectively does your company share stories about its giving?
If it wasn’t whispered at a Monday meeting or in the breakroom, it never happened.
Occasional Slack posts with emojis and memes, or a newsletter blurb buried under three other announcements.
We broadcast impact like Hollywood premieres — videos, posts, GIFs, charts, and maybe a small parade.
How smooth is giving?
Chaotic. Last month, we accidentally donated staplers to a hamster shelter.
Mostly okay, but sometimes we wing it and call it ‘creative philanthropy.'
Everything flows perfectly. Spreadsheets auto-fill. Notifications ping. Coffee refills itself.
Do you know if your giving works?
Does it work? Probably? Maybe? We’re pretty sure someone got a thank-you note.
We try to track it, but our spreadsheets have evolved into a cryptic language only the intern understands.
Dashboards, KPIs, surveys, stories, maybe even interpretive dance videos — we know exactly what’s happening.
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