Supportive Parent Acknowledgment Form

The Golden Rule of Youth Sports:

Prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child.

This simple principle is the foundation of everything you'll find here. As you read through these twelve guidelines, you'll discover that allowing your child to occasionally struggle — and even fail — is not only OK, it's essential to their growth.

1. The Three Pitfalls for Sports Parents

When a child's achievement becomes a source of identity and status, three things can happen to even the most well-meaning parent:

1. Parental Pride — their success feels like our success
2. Disappointment — their setbacks feel like our setbacks
3. Lack of Objectivity — we see them through rose-colored glasses

Understanding these tendencies in ourselves is the first step.

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2. Extreme Examples

We've all seen that parent on the sideline. The one who screams at referees, argues with coaches, or makes the drive home miserable after a loss. It's easy to watch and think, "I would never go that far." But do you ever cross the line at all? If so, this may be how others see you — and this video of actual sideline brawls may surprise you.

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3. Parents and Playing Time

When parents aren't angry at officials or the other team, they're often angry at their own coach. And it almost always comes down to one thing: playing time. The kids getting the most time have the happiest parents; the kids on the bench have parents who think the coach is a jerk. When things aren't going your child's way, parental intervention is never the answer. It's almost always better for everyone — coach, player and team — if the player initiates that conversation, not the parent.

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4. My Child is Being Treated Unfairly

When our child isn't getting the playing time or opportunities we think they deserve, it's easy to assume the coach is biased or has it in for them. But there are always two sides to every story. In this video, read real complaints from frustrated parents alongside the coach's perspective — and judge for yourself.

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5. Parents and Coaches

Disagreeing with a coach's decisions is natural. Organizing a campaign to have them removed is something else entirely. This video examines real situations where parents took matters into their own hands — and the damage it caused to the team, the kids, and the program.

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6. Six Types of Unsupportive Parents

Most of us are good people — but competitive youth sports has a way of bringing out less-than-desirable traits in even the best parents. Through years of observation, six types of unsupportive sports parents emerge repeatedly.
1. B-Rated (Berating child for poor play)
2. Rose Colored Glasses ("My child can do no wrong")
3. Activist (Tries to get other parents against the coach)
4. Behind-the-Back (Criticizing other players to the coach)
5. Underminer (Contradicting the coach at home)
6. Loudmouth (Yelling at officials)
Have you ever slipped into any of these?

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7. Tools for Becoming a Supportive Parent

A noted child psychologist once published an article entitled Prepare the Child for the Path, Not the Path for the Child — acknowledging that when parents intercede every time their child is frustrated, we rob them of the opportunity to solve problems themselves. The "Helicopter Parent" has been replaced by an even more troubling trend — the "Lawnmower Parent," who tries to clear every obstacle from their child's path. The most powerful tool? Accepting that setbacks and failures can provide more valuable lessons than successes.

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8. It's Not Your Fault!

Parents often fall into the trap of allowing their children to blame others for failures and disappointments. But once a child realizes that excuses won't be accepted and coddling isn't coming, they're forced out of the comfortable cocoon of self-pity — and begin learning that they alone control their own happiness.

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9. Goals and Expectations

Before the season begins, both children and parents should set realistic goals — and ask themselves honestly how they'll react if those goals aren't met. Deciding in advance how to handle disappointment makes frustration less likely.

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10. Communication

The conversations you have with your child after a tough game or practice matter more than you might think. When they complain about a coach or feel slighted by a lineup decision, resist the urge to validate the frustration. Instead, ask questions: "Does the coach treat everyone that way?" or "Why do you think you're not starting?" That shift — from sympathy to curiosity — is where productive growth begins.

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11. I Really Need to Talk to the Coach!

Still convinced a conversation with the coach is necessary? Ask yourself these questions first:

• Has your child attempted to talk to the coach?
• Is this about something other than playing time?
• Are you basing this on more than what your child told you?
• Have you considered what you hope to accomplish?
• Can you be respectful and non-confrontational?
• Would it be better to let things play out?
• Does your child actually want you to do this?
  
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12. The Benefits of Becoming a Supportive Parent

The rewards of making this commitment are real:

1. A better relationship with your child
2. More enjoyment and less anxiety — for you and for them
3. A child better equipped to face adversity
4. No regrets over something said or done in the heat of the moment
   
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